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  • Writer's pictureSinem Soydar

I was high, but not sure if I was flying

Updated: Feb 20, 2021

This piece is the 2nd part of my last one. It is funny since I had no clue that I’ll need to write on the same topic. But, life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans, right?

In my last piece, I was saying I know my passion, and I want to write. Therefore, I made a plan to write weekly and drafted a shortlist of my topics. Then, something happened, and I need to write this piece first that was not on my list.

I got the inspiration from Clayton M.Christensen’s book: How will you measure your life?

I think the paragraph below gives us a perfect summary of our plans and decisions:

“In our lives and in our careers, whether we are aware of it or not, we are constantly navigating a path by deciding between our deliberate strategies and the unanticipated alternatives to emerge. Each approach is vying for our minds and hearts, making its best case to become our actual strategy”. (p.48)

In many parts of the book, Mr Christensen mentioned that if the main strategy is solid enough to achieve the goal, even people cannot proceed it 100%. The evolved strategy would lead to another fulfilment.

I think it is also very promising to keep the good vibe, isn’t it?

Let me get back to my story and share a good real-life example of a fulfilment case.


Like most of you, I had some accomplishments before in my professional or academic life. However, some of the achievements had not linked to the passions, like being the fastest in the school run or passing SATs. And I think it is the reason for the unlinked accomplishments’ happiness vanished quickly.

However, when we completed, put out, achieved something we like and love, that feeling is fantastic! We feel like superheroes. It makes us stronger, sharp. It makes us high!

Here comes my enlightening moment: That day, I published my latest piece on; I was happy about the result. I was enough encouraged to share the article on my social networks. The number of reads started to increase, and people liked it, how nice it was!

It was a regular workday. I dealt with housekeeping and my son’s sports lesson, typical busy weekday, but I had the chance to share my piece. Everything is nearly perfect!

I mean, till we had our dinner. When my husband sat dinner table, he was a bit distracted about his workload, barely talking. We had fish that I had cooked. And we had a brief conversation below:

Wife: How tasty the fish, isn’t it?

Husband: Not at all, it is all dry!

OMG!?! What did he say? Isn’t it too harsh? I cooked dinner for all of us, and he said he did not like it.

Generally, I would think like this and react accordingly to what I feel at that time. However, this time, I said something different.

Wife: Really? Hmm, ok.

Since I accomplished something that day, I had not personalized the comment, either pushed the conversation. Indeed, “the dinner had not cooked well” was a fair comment, and it did not hurt me. Unlike the other days, my self-confidence was nourished enough to be more objective because I had achieved something that was a part of my passion.

It was a perfect moment of awareness! I was happy and sad at the same time. I was glad to see how it makes me feel better following my passion. I was sorry to see how long I wasted my time without understanding reality.

Then I started to think about my emotions. I wanted to be sure if it was a pure fulfilment what I felt early that day or an illusion of my satisfied ego. And magically, I ran into a video on YouTube from Hans Wilhelm “Do you follow your passion?” My one part says it is the universe that brings the video to me. The other part says I searched lots of queries on Google, so it is only AI, I don’t care. But I care about the video because it has a fundamental definition of passion. Love & Serve driven ambitions are real passions that can bring good to humanity.

Indeed, I want to make people smile; give them a new perspective. Therefore, my writing passion comes from my pure love to serve the people. I will not lie; I feel relieved that I am still the person I want to be.

So far, I can say that I am on track. I carry on creating a value — for now, it is meaningful for me, hope you think the same — and it feels good. Actually, it feels perfect like I am high but without flying :)

I hope to feel this way and keep on production as long as I have passion! Thanks for reading and encouraging me! I would appreciate if you could share your comments and help me to improve myself.

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